Starting Over

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Mark Twain

Sometimes, we chose to start over because we need a fresh start, but sometimes we have to start over because everything changes. When that happens we have to make choices. Even standing still is a choice made. I’ve spent the last 9 months gathering myself together into the person I am right now. And now, now I’m ready to begin again. I’m not very good at standing still or waiting for life to happen to me. I’m pretty good at dreaming though. Not in that foolish and childish kind of way, but in believing if I work really hard, I treat people well and I am always aware of who I am I can touch what now I can only feel.

The first step to my new beginning comes when I take possession of my new home. Actually it really came when I decided to pursue the purchase, but beginnings need a definite place and time so closing on this house seems to be the biggest marker. In fact it’s the biggest decision I have even made on my own. But it’s mine, I own it and I will make it work. Not only will it be my home, it will also be my studio and gallery. I plan on opening the gallery next Spring. The working name of which is “Color Notes Art Gallery”.

There are a couple of pearls of wisdom from my grandfather, Grandpa Mike or Popup as we’d call him, use to say that keep popping into my head. The first became a family joke, “All it needs is a coat of paint” he’d say. As a result any shack we’d pass during family trips would elicit that same comment. It carried on to the next generation too, as my husband and I and our kids went for family trips, “All it needs is a coat of paint” was heard again and again. So even though the list of needs for my new house is a bit longer than that, I know Grandpa Mike is in my corner too.

The next pearl I lean on quite heavily too. My mother told me that when they’d bought the house we grew up in she was worried about being able to afford it. Grandpa Mike told her, “There’s no point in worrying, it’s always the things you don’t expect that get you”. While I believe I have accounted for all contingencies, Grandpa Mike was right. Bearing that in mind it does no good to be paralyzed by what might go wrong, sometimes you have to take chances to get to where you want to go.

Let the balancing act begin then. The next few months will be a combination of complete chaos and taking charge of my life. I need to continue painting, oversee work being done to my new house, do some of the work myself and start packing up to leave this one. I know I can’t do it all myself so more decisions have to be made. I may need to make a list of my lists!